Things not to say to or around your wife. A little History

I would like to start out by saying I love my wife dearly, and would never say the types of things you will see in this blog in anger or frustration.
We have been married for over 2 years, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Most of this starts by me laughing a lot before the words just slip out.
She knows that when I start laughing a lot, that whatever I am about to say, I will probably regret.


When we met, we both worked together in IT at Dell.
I was looking for someone to translate for me with a Mexican customer who didn't speak English.
Julieta came to the rescue. She translated for me.

Then many months (and many funny stories)later I married my wonderful Mexican wife.

Instead of trying to go through the hassle of getting both of our large families and friends together all in one place, we ran off to Vegas to get married.

It was amazing, we were married in the Valley of Fire outside of Vegas.
Once we got back, we then proceeded to tell everyone what we did.
We go to my parents house to tell them what we did.

So we start describing the place were we where married. My dad informs us that we were X number of miles from Area 51.
My mom, seeing a chance for a quick jab insult, looks to Juli and says about me, "So you married an alien".
Before I knew the words were coming out of my mouth, I responded with "No mom, I checked her papers, she's legal".

Did you know that shoes can travel at very high velocities? :)
This embarrassed mom quite a bit. Juli thought it was hysterical.

Thus begins our life together, and my many lessons of things not to say to or around my wife.